i hope this one gets more comments but still positive ones
Adolf Hitler meets Isaiah Cohen
In 1944 the Americans sent an undercover agent to Auschwitz but made the capital mistake to give this top secret job to a Negro, so that the Nazis had the chance to quickly prevent the whole thing. The unfortunate agent, Isaiah Cohen, a black young man from Eugene, Ohio, was caught and interrogated the very same day by Übersturmbahnführer Hitler who, a problem that he was confronted with every day, not related to his renowned namesake. Because none of my loyal fans can understand German, I was so kind to translate the conversation between Isaiah and Adolf into English. ‘My name is Adolf Hitler’, introduced the Übersturmbahnführer himself to his prisoner. Isaiah started laughing. ‘And I am General Eisenhower, nice to meet you’, he chuckled. The extremely hot poker that Adolf shoved through his pants, into his arse made an end to all the fun. Now Adolf wasn’t a violent man, but he got tired from all the jokes around his name, so he could get pretty aggressive lately. ‘Sorry’, he said to Isaiah, ‘it all got a little too much for me’, and he pulled the poker out of Isaiah’s crack. ‘You don’t have to apologize’, said the American, still pulling faces from the incredible pain. ‘I know what you mean. With that war and all. I wanted too stay home as well, with my fiancée Cindy. But hey, a man is an undercover agent or he isn’t’. ‘In fact, I find that undercover stuff pretty interesting’, said Adolf, and he poured them both a shot of schnapps. ‘Sometimes it is, sometimes it isn’t.’ said Isaiah. ‘Cheers by the way.’, and he took a giant gulp of schnapps. ‘A lot depends from the result. Today for example, I’m quite bummed. How did you guys caught me so fast by the way? Am I betrayed?’ ‘No, there were a couple of things that helped us found out,’, answered Adolf, ‘firstly the fact that you are a nigger…’ ‘Shit,’, interrupted Isaiah,’ now you’ve mentioned it. How could we not think of that problem....?’ ‘And secondly,’ continued Adolf, ‘the fact you tried to help 200.000 Jews escape today.’ ‘Yeah, I know, it was a bit optimistic of me. Good schnapps you have there, could I have another shot?’ ‘Later, first I have to torture you some more.’ ‘Well ok, let’s get it over with.’ Adolf pulled Isaiah’s nails out, skinned him alive; and poured salt on the quivering flesh; poured 20 galleons of night soil through a funnel into his stomach; removed his eyelids with a knife and forced him to watch a bright light for hours. After that he poured out two more shots. ‘Motherfucker buddy, you know what you’re doing’, groaned Isaiah. ‘Well,’, said Adolf while he blushed (he couldn’t deal very well with compliments), ‘I’ve had a good training.’ And they chit chatted further for a few hours, until the time was come that Isaiah would be hung up, together with the 200.000 Jews, that attempted to escape the previous day, and who’s hanging was meant to be deterrent for the remaining inhabitants of the camp. That night, Adolf Hitler lied in his bed and was thinking- as so many nights when he was lonely- about the change of name he would take when the war would be over. ’Isaiah Cohen’ started to grow on him, but that was obviously a Negro name. Too bad that I’m not a nigger, thought Adolf Hitler, and he dropped off to sleep. Tomorrow is another day.
