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Bloody hell! https://metalreviews.com/phpBB/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=6567 |
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Author: | Goat [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:22 pm ] |
Post subject: | Bloody hell! |
A Jewish associate just emailed this to me: Quote: hi guys, someone showed this to me, i figured ill share
A young and successful executive was traveling down a neighborhood street, going a bit too fast in his new Jaguar. He was watching for kids darting out from between parked cars and slowed down when he thought he saw something. As his car passed, no children appeared. Instead a brick smashed into the Jag's side door. He slammed on the brakes and backed the Jag back to the spot where the brick had been thrown. The angry driver then jumped out of the car, grabbed the nearest kid and pushed him up against a parked car shouting, "What was this all about and who are you? just what the heck are you doing? Thats a new car and that brick you threw is going to cost alot of money. Why did you do it?!" The young boy was apologetic. "Please, mister... please, i'm sorry but i didnt know waht else to do," He pleaded. "I threw the brick because noone else would sto..." With tears dripping down his face and off his chin, the youth pointed to a spot just around a parked car. "Its my brother," he said "he rolled off the curb and fell out of his wheelchair and i cant lift him up." Now sobbing, the boy asked the stunned executive, "Would you please help me get him back into his wheelchair? Hes hurt and hes too heavy for me." Moved beyond words, the driver tried to swollow the rapidly swelling lump in his throat. He hurridly lifted the handicapped boy back into the wheelchair, then took out his fancy hankerchief and dabbed at the fresh scrapes and cuts. A quick look told him everything was going to be ok. "Thank you, and may God bless you," the grateful child told the stranger. Too shook up for words, the man simply watched the boy push his wheelchair bound brother down the sidewalk towards their home. It was a long, slow walk back to the Jaguar. The damage was very noticable, but the driver never bothered to repair the dented side door. He kept it there to remind him of this message. "Dont go thru life so fast that someone has to throw a brick at you to get your attention!" God whispers in our souls and speaks to our hearts. Sometimes when we dont have time to listen, he has to throw a brick at us. It's our choice. If God had a refrigirator, your picture would be on it. If God had a wallet your picture would be in it. He sends you flowers every spring. He sends you a sunrise every morning. Face it, friend - He's crazy about you God didnt promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow, sun withour rain. But he did promise strength for the pain, comfort for the tears and light for the way. Is this what's known as 'making a pass'? :? |
Author: | Astaroth [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:28 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
ow.. what a lovely story ![]() |
Author: | Goat [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:31 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Astaroth wrote: ow.. what a lovely story
![]() I was sure it was going to end with the 'disabled' kid stabbing him in the face or something. I must say, if some little shit dented my car with such a flimsy excuse I'd run them both over, and I like kids! Dread to think what Kayla'd do. Ah, religion. |
Author: | Carnifex Umbris [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:33 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Zad wrote: Astaroth wrote: ow.. what a lovely story ![]() I was sure it was going to end with the 'disabled' kid stabbing him in the face or something. I must say, if some little shit dented my car with such a flimsy excuse I'd run them both over, and I like kids! Dread to think what Kayla'd do. Ah, religion. What? Just because I don't want to have kids myself doesn't mean I want to hurt the ones that do exist. |
Author: | Goat [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:39 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Carnifex Umbris wrote: Zad wrote: Astaroth wrote: ow.. what a lovely story ![]() I was sure it was going to end with the 'disabled' kid stabbing him in the face or something. I must say, if some little shit dented my car with such a flimsy excuse I'd run them both over, and I like kids! Dread to think what Kayla'd do. Ah, religion. What? Just because I don't want to have kids myself doesn't mean I want to hurt the ones that do exist. Even if they attacked your car? Anyway, meant you more as a general example of a non-kid-lover. |
Author: | Kathaarian [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:43 pm ] |
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If someone is going to scratch my future Jag in order to give me a religious awakening it better be Jesus himself. Only he can tolerate the pain I'm going to deliver. |
Author: | Goat [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:44 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Kathaarian wrote: If someone is going to scratch my future Jag in order to give me a religious awakening it better be Jesus himself. Only he can tolerate the pain I'm going to deliver.
Not Mohammed? |
Author: | Radagast [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:46 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Couldn't God have just, y'know, used his OMNIPOTENT POWAZ to say "yo dude, there's like a tard on the ground over there?" |
Author: | Kathaarian [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:48 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Zad wrote: Kathaarian wrote: If someone is going to scratch my future Jag in order to give me a religious awakening it better be Jesus himself. Only he can tolerate the pain I'm going to deliver. Not Mohammed? No, he can kick my ass. He led armies of thousands and kicked a lot of ass in his time. |
Author: | Goat [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:50 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Kathaarian wrote: Zad wrote: Kathaarian wrote: If someone is going to scratch my future Jag in order to give me a religious awakening it better be Jesus himself. Only he can tolerate the pain I'm going to deliver. Not Mohammed? No, he can kick my ass. He led armies of thousands and kicked a lot of ass in his time. Ah. Moses'd win an armwrestle, though. Can your guy split the sea? I don't think SO! |
Author: | Anonymous [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:52 pm ] |
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So if you need to get someone's attention but he is running through the street too fast, it is entirely warranted to throw a brick in his face? |
Author: | Radagast [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:54 pm ] |
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And he never got the dent fixed? Penny pinching Jew. |
Author: | Goat [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:56 pm ] |
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It's this bit that creeps me out: Quote: If God had a refrigirator, your picture would be on it.
If God had a wallet your picture would be in it. He sends you flowers every spring. He sends you a sunrise every morning. Face it, friend - He's crazy about you So, God's a teenage girl with a crush on me? What a pity all those Jews pissed him off fifty-odd years ago. |
Author: | Radagast [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 5:59 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Wait, wait, wait.....hold everything....God doesn't have a fridge? Where does he keep his God beer? And his God yoghurt? :shock: |
Author: | Goat [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 6:00 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Radagast wrote: Wait, wait, wait.....hold everything....God doesn't have a fridge? Where does he keep his God beer? And his God yoghurt? :shock:
Oh, he's got a fridge. Just not a "refrigirator", whatever the hell they are. |
Author: | Carnifex Umbris [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 6:21 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Zad wrote: Carnifex Umbris wrote: Zad wrote: Astaroth wrote: ow.. what a lovely story ![]() I was sure it was going to end with the 'disabled' kid stabbing him in the face or something. I must say, if some little shit dented my car with such a flimsy excuse I'd run them both over, and I like kids! Dread to think what Kayla'd do. Ah, religion. What? Just because I don't want to have kids myself doesn't mean I want to hurt the ones that do exist. Even if they attacked your car? Anyway, meant you more as a general example of a non-kid-lover. I'd kick anyone's ass who attacked my beloved Ramenmobile. Age doesn't matter. |
Author: | Metalhead_Bastard [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 7:29 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
*child throws brick at future Pete's car, Pete walks over, disabled kid yadayada. "May God bless your soul etc!" Pete pushes him down steep hill whilst he screams going into oncoming traffic. "Mister, I'm sorry!" "It's OK, the damage can be repaired." Pete gets into the car, kicks the the little bastard to the floor, shuts the door and reverses over his head* The little prick could've tthrown something else at the car, a small rock or something, maybe himself. Fuck God. |
Author: | Jürgen [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 7:48 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Metalhead_Bastard wrote: *child throws brick at future Pete's car, Pete walks over, disabled kid yadayada. "May God bless your soul etc!" Pete pushes him down steep hill whilst he screams going into oncoming traffic. "Mister, I'm sorry!" "It's OK, the damage can be repaired." Pete gets into the car, kicks the the little bastard to the floor, shuts the door and reverses over his head*
The little prick could've tthrown something else at the car, a small rock or something, maybe himself. Fuck God. Priceless. ![]() |
Author: | Anonymous [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 10:09 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Metalhead_Bastard wrote: *child throws brick at future Pete's car, Pete walks over, disabled kid yadayada. "May God bless your soul etc!" Pete pushes him down steep hill whilst he screams going into oncoming traffic. "Mister, I'm sorry!" "It's OK, the damage can be repaired." Pete gets into the car, kicks the the little bastard to the floor, shuts the door and reverses over his head*
The little prick could've tthrown something else at the car, a small rock or something, maybe himself. Fuck God. Slightly flawed, as the little child would obviously own your ass completely. |
Author: | Astaroth [ Tue Jun 20, 2006 10:40 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
Slayer Of Kings wrote: Metalhead_Bastard wrote: *child throws brick at future Pete's car, Pete walks over, disabled kid yadayada. "May God bless your soul etc!" Pete pushes him down steep hill whilst he screams going into oncoming traffic. "Mister, I'm sorry!" "It's OK, the damage can be repaired." Pete gets into the car, kicks the the little bastard to the floor, shuts the door and reverses over his head* The little prick could've tthrown something else at the car, a small rock or something, maybe himself. Fuck God. Slightly flawed, as the little child would obviously own your ass completely. indeed.. that and the fact homeless ppl don't have cars ![]() |
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