Metal Reviews

...and make the world a better place.

So there I was, nestling into my chair in the lecture theatre, sorting out my pages and pens, and this young guy sits next to me. Instantly I had that weird vibe you get when you know someone wants something from you, like a salesman. I tried to ignore him at first but he obviously wanted my attention by leaning too close. I have an unfortunate habit of attracting gay people (damn gypsy curse) but my spider sense was telling me this wasn't one.

So eventually he says, "Hi, I'm Mark" or whatever the fuck his name was. "Oh, hi, I'm S...." I reply politely. "So what made you want to become a teacher?" he asks. I go on about some crap and eventually I have to say "so that is my story, and you?"

At this point he talks about what studies he's been doing and very slyly includes the words "and I found Christianity in college", and continues with his story (which had something to do with wanting to make rockets or some shit). Immediately my alarm bells went off, but I had to ask. "So what has finding Christianity got to do with teaching?" I know, pretty obvious when you see it written down. But then he does something I didn't expect. He changed the subject to the tough time he had on his practice teaching excursion.

So I thought nothing further of it. That was until the halfway break during the lecture when he leans seductively across and says "So...do you know Jesus?"

"Don't even fucking talk to me about religion," I retort very rudely, "do I honestly look like an idiot that you can sell that shit to?"

Seriously. I hate these fucking squirmy little turds.

People that try to recruit you like that are incredibly annoying I agree. Sometimes I can handle it, like I have a friend who's very religious and instead of saying goodbye he always says "god bless" or some such thing, and that doesn't bother because it's just a nice gesture and he's not trying to push it on me. But when they try to sell you on their religion I find it incredibly offensive. How are they to know that I don't already have a religion I'm perfectly happy with, or don't need one at all.

Fuck I also hate missionaries. So much.

Which university do you teach in ? I'm studying in University of Queensland.

Sickens me that sometimes in campus some guy/girl would come to me, and act all friendly chatting random stuff etc... and then they ask if i had any problems in life and then Jesus/Christianity comes in. Once a guy even came up to me thinking i am lost soul with personal anger to god because i wear a Possessed Seven Churches tshirt

First few times i said no politely, after that it's just a blunt 'fuck off'.

There are Christians like this yes, but there are also other people who push things on you as well. All Christians are not bad people. It seems like that is impossible for people to realize.

And there is nothing wrong with missionaries. My future wife just went on one in Jamaica. She visited handicap orphanages, baby orphanages, and a childrens orphanage. So if going to help sick homeless children is looked down upon then I could see why you would say you hate missionaries.

It's cool that she's helping but seriously, if I was hungry and someone gave me food, and started talking about jesus, I'd eat the food first, then told him/her to go fuck themselves. Helping with waiting something in return in terrible. Keep your stupid bullshit to yourselves.

I'm not saying your gf does that. Just talking about missionaries that I know. There are plenty here too. And they should all fuck off.

It is quite irritating that people can't have their spirituality on a personal level instead of always trying to forcefeed others with it. What religion other people adhere to is none of my concern as long as they're not making it my concern themselves.

Nothing wrong with helping children and things like that, but when/if it has the motive of advertising belief systems it's tasteless. (I'm not saying that is the case with your fiance metalNESS, cause I don't know).

Many christians (and other religious groups) would do well thinking about the fact that if their beliefs were actually beyond dispute they wouldn't be beliefs anymore, they would be knowledge.

People that think they know 'the truth' and hold 'the answears' are ignorant and irritating. What's true to you is not necessarily true for me.


Foodnote: There might be a bit of self-contradiction in this post. I'm sorry. It's just because I don't know the truth.

I'm a student at Griffith Uni. UQ is MASSIVE! I occassionally go over there for archaeology stuff.

Oh I forgot to mention; missionaries = cultural cancer.

wtf nobody ever tries to convert me :(

The most I ever get is crazy Gouranga! people. But all they want is money. Anyone else got accosted by these robe-wearing goons or is it a Glasgow-only thing?

I usually try to be as respectfull and patiant as possible when approached. Unless you happen to be the Jehovas Witness lady who somehow magically got a hold of my phone number. Now those people are persistant to no end.

Never in the UK. But there was a Hare Krishna tent at this festival I've been to a couple of times in Budapest. All day long they'd just be singing "Gouranga Gouranga Gouranga Hey!". A lot of it was typical acoustic chant a longs, but they had a couple of pretty neat metal and punk bands doing it as well. I loved those guys.

Haha! My Jehovas haven't been back since I told them I worship Ometeotl, supreme deity of the four Tezcatlipocas.

Pffft. I just hit them with "no dice" and keep walking.

One day i'm going to snap and say "So you need money to make people happy? Why don't you just get a job? Ooooh, your religion forbids physical labour....that's an unfortunate coincidence, is it not? So you just want the money that other people earned by selling their freedom, is that it? Hmmm? Well?"

Lol I wish I had been that creative.

My laziness forbids physical labour. I guess they at least have a better excuse than that.

i get approached by old people often, both near my home and near the university. being old people i try not to be disrespectful, a clear "i'm atheist" always got the problem solved.

sometimes a see jehova's witnesses (at least that's what i think they are) but i've always managed to avoid them. i heard they'll stalk you if they get any information on you.

next time stick your hand out in that "stop" way and say "talk to the hand". yes.

OR OR OR you could pretend you're also a preacher from some other crazy cult! RELIGIOUS KOMBAT!

I see those Hare Krishna guys every time i go to london. But they never try and convert you, to busy singing and bouncing around.

THe Sziget festival?


On subject, they never come to me either, I do my convincing fuck-off-I'm-a-psychopat-and-I-will-snap-your-neck-before-you-start look and then they never dare to give me the flyer, ask for money or convert me to xtianity.