Metal Reviews

Dancer In The Dark

Oh my God.

Outlaw

First off, I hate Danny Dyer so this was never going to be the best thing I've ever seen but even so it was shit. Trying to talk about modern day thug culture was ridiculous "some kids on my street set a 78 year old woman on fire for ringing the police...after they tried to rob her...three times! And you know what the police said? Paperwork!"

Absolutely fucking ridiculous film which tried to be smart...It was just shit-it even had little moments where they tried to in some small way conquer racism...How shit.

The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford

6.5/10

This movie could have been really good...like a classic. Unfortunately, despite great actors and what could have been a great plot, the moviemakers ruined it by making the exposition 2+ hours long and reducing the pace of the movie to that of a snail. Seriously, once Ford starts thinking about killing James, it gets really interesting, but unfortunately by then they've already spent 2 and a half hours explaining the relationship between the two. Still worth a watch, I suppose, but it could have been done much better. Makes me want to read the book, though.

i didn't mind how slow that movie was (i tend to have lots of patience for slowness). Brad Pitt's performance was ridiculously good. i've heard the original version of it was 4 hours long.

Citizen Kane - would have been very good if it wasn't some 20 minutes too long.

The slowness didn't really bother me either. They just spent way too much time on the stuff leading up to the assassination.

Maybe that sounds contradictory, but oh well...makes sense in my head . And actually, I'd say it was pretty good--probably a 7 or 7.5. Still could have been better, but I'm thinking about it a lot the next day and that's a good sign. The nature shots were pretty awesome too.

Oh yeah it was hilariously shite.

Like how one of the bad guys is just sooo evil. It's not bad enough that he's a murdering gangster...let's make him a fucking peado as well. Or, as Bob 'Oskins so eloquently put it: "The geezer's a fucking nonce!"

I also like how Sean Bean couldn't bring himself to execute the murdering child molester but like 5 minutes later he knee-capped and then hung one of his own team just for being a bit of a dick.

What you guys said.

Waitress - Jesus Christ. Not only did the silly bitch have the baby of the man she hated (because he was soooo mean and like, threw a chair and slapped her and stuff) but she took the entire film to tell him she wanted a divorce. And she didn't go off with Nathan Filion. And apparently the annoying one was the director as well and someone shot her soon after the film was made. He must've seen an early cut or something.

Ravenous - Guy Pierce vs cannibals. entertaining but not great

I got into a massive argument about this film with two of my mates yesterday who thought it was great, haha. They clearly weren't watching the same film; eventually I talked them round by claiming they like Southerners until they rejected the film. Aaah, prejudice.

Yeah, it was ok.


Death at a funeral - I loled. 8/10.

I like that film, it has a really wierd atmosphere.

Might watch Eastern Promises tonight, any good?

Eastern Promises was ok, but I found it rather overrated. You'll love the scene in the sauna, though. Hot action!

If this turns out to be a gay scene so you can piss me off I'll lol haha.

Haha, you have no idea.

Ooooh shit.

Atonement--really damn good. Not usually a fan of love stories, but this one isn't typical.

Watership Down - Disturbing. I don't know if I should be glad or sad that I hadn't watched it when I was younger.

That film is infamous for traumatising kids. Not seen, actually.

Haha, it's hardcore.