Metal Reviews

In the "I'm back" thread it was revealed that swallowing anti-depressiva is quite prevalent. Some arguments:

In the so called civilised states, 4% (not including unreported cases) of the population suffers depression (including my wife as seroius case and myself as healed case). Let’s make very clear what this means. The error band of any normal distribution (e.g. mental health of people) is 99, 73%. That is, it would be “normal” that the mental state of 0, 27% people is abnormal and subject to medical treatment. But they declare 4% as abnormal and feed them with pills to keep them calm and hide the problem. So what is the problem? The problem is that the people are right to become depressive, and the more intelligent they are the more they tend towards killing themselves. I mean, just look around and ask who or what is going to give you a reason to live. Science is telling you is you that you are some sort of biomechanical machine that is producing consciousness as an arbitrary side effect, Religion together with it’s vengeful and jealously god(s) totally fails to provide what it should that is to say the re-connection (Latin: religio) to the origin from which all has evolved. And what about Politics? Well…

So this is what we have been told: "You are a machine that comes from nowhere, without a cause, without a destination, without any higher sense other than to believe in an almighty asshole." So why the hell should I want to live? Well, deep within ourselves we know that there is more and everyone who dares to think for himself and to make his own conclusions and judgements can find out what it is. The point is, we all have been told lies from our birth, we were made slaves to scientific evidence (since I have been a scientist myself, I know that they are worth shit) and "rational" behaviour patterns - and we have no chance to find the truth about life unless we overcome this imprint. And here the loop is closed, because one natural reaction to overcome this bunch of shit is to become depressive. I don’t know if it is a comedy or a tragedy that we need pills to stand our own believes … those shitty believes that brought us in the mental state, in which we are.

Thoughts?

I think people that have "darker" personalities are more likely to listen to metal- because it glories in the more brutal or sinister side of life. In a nutshell I guess that's why we have so many depressed people here. I also think that in order to experience happiness and fulfilment then you also have to have previously experienced very deep low points as well. I guess the objective in life is just to try and finish up on the happy side.

Anyway, three of my best friends have had serious depression, and one has had a wierd kind of nervous breakdown. This makes me think I must kind of suck as a friend. :(

I don't think i could ever pass coment on what depression is all about, i would just be trivializing a very deep subject that no really understands.

I've been depressed for as long as I can remember so I don't even think about this any more. I found out that I have to deal with it and suicide is not an option because I can not do this to the people who love me and I never chose the easy way, I'm just too strong and arrogant to do so. I did once see suicide as a way out because I didn't believe in an afterlife so that would be the end of all things, if I'm dead then I won't regret not being alive, right ? It's totally stuid to think like that and I just don't do it anymore. That's where my new found belief in God comes from, I just have to find a reason to all this or I couldn't go on. So now I'll just spend some good time with friends and family until smoking and drinking gets me.

Good thread.

Depression to me is both a state of mind and an actual physical problem.. recognising the futility of most things is a conclusion a depressed person reaches through introspection, but the way that you begin not to enjoy things you know you like is something deeper and less controllable. I guess everyone experiences that to a varying degree because being unsatisfiable is basically part of being human.. but depression certainly magnifies the effect.

You don't become irrational through periods of depression so much as you gradually justify alternate behaviour to yourself.. there's no distinction to someone else but it's a wonderful thing as an individual - it puzzles me that people seek therapy and medication for the condition because frankly I do my best thinking during dark spells. but then I'm not much for simple pleasures; personally I get my kicks by using my brain so the idea of shutting the thing off through alcohol, therapeutic adjustment or routine actually disgusts me. I don't really intend to be reassimilated.

Since I didn't post in the other thread, I'll merely mention I was disagnosed as having the same thing many others had at age 17. I ended up being put on 4 or 5 different pills. Like many others here, I have come to the conclusion that pills don't work very well and have been off them for quite some time. I guess I always remain slightly glum but it is a hell of a lot better than having a serious disease.

Heavy stuff. Wahtever you do, however you feel, always know that you are not "wrong" for feeling that way. I know doctors and scientists and such will try to tell you there is something wrong with you, but that's not true. I feel being depressed is just a natural feeling. One that can be very dangerous no doubt, but it is natural.

The world is fucked-up, and not a happy place. Just because you choose to see that doesn't make you fucked-up. I'd rather know the grim reality than fool myself into thinking that "Peace, Love, and Rainbows for all" will ever be the way the world works. I hate people who try to act happy all of the time, they are living a lie. If you feel like shit, embrace it for a while. Everything has two sides.

And suicide is stupid. It accomplishes nothing, only hurts your family, and "Let's the bastards win" if you will. I know everyone here is strong, and none of you should ever succumb to such feelings. Having them from time to time is natural, and I think it happens to everyone. But never give in to it. All of your lives are valuable, someone someday will think you are the coolest person to ever walk the face of the Earth and truly love you for it.

PS- you don't need a pill to be happy. Plus the long-term effects of those medicines are far worse than anything depression can do to you.

EI, have you ever really felt like suicide is the only answer? When you're there, you don't think rationally. It even seems to make sense. No matter which way you add it up down there, it always comes out the same way.

Without these pills I'd still be there. Are the pills worse than death?

At the same time... if one is only able to stay in this world when drugged up... if one is only good drugged up... then what good is one?

I once ate a whole bottle of those "anti-depressants" and followed it up with an unhealthy amount of alcohol. Imagine my anger when I woke up. I must have an iron stomach.

To the second part of your post, what makes you think in such a manner? Shit sucks, but NOTHING is so bad it's worth taking your own life over. When I was your age I felt the same way, I really did. Your are still young and have your whole life to go. I know it's a cliche, but age does indeed bring wisdom, and the older you get the more you realize that life is worth living in a strange and twisted way.

Despite a few past spats we've had, I find you to be an awesome dude, someone I could hang out with in real life. I know you are having a hard time, but you are worth a lot. Everyone here is, and I know the majority of the people here feel the same. You have friends here, friends who really do care. It makes me sad to see you post such things, for you are better than this. You will beat it, that much I can say for sure. I did, my girlfriend did, I know you will as well. Everyday is a new horizon, and a second chance. Embrace your life, and take it by the balls. Life is indeed what you make it. But never waste it, never waste a day, or even a minute. I know you have immense potential, you truly have a brilliant mind, and I would hate to see it wasted.

You don't think bleeding rationally down there, all right? I have a bloody chemical imbalance like all the other men in the Krilov family have, and there's something wrong with my head so that I can't be bleeding rational all the time.

But it's the same for everyone who's suffered such intense depression that they either seriously entertain or accept the idea of suicide. You think yourself into a corner and your mind becomes your enemy. Eventually you just kill yourself to escape truth.

I know life is worth living, but a part of me doesn't know that, and this part must be straitjacketed and gagged at all times, you see?



Thanks for the kind words. I don't feel like killing myself now, so no worries.

Yeah, likewise. Once I can get into over-18 gigs, and you drop over to NY for a gig or something, I'll show up and we can hang or something. Unless you live in Nebraska or something.

I'm not depressed, other than occasionally feeling like shit etc. nothing wrong.

Funny thing is I'm going through an all time low mood these days myself, lots of changes going on in my life, but for very different reasons. Just got appointed to the hospital (I'm a doctor) doing tedious stuff which I really hate and not really gaining any knowledge at all, co-workers I don't really fit in with, etcetc. So I'm at this sucky state where the mind works uncontrollably trying to figure out what's wrong, and you start questioning everything about your life. So here's how I see it:

First of all about this whole "why are we here" thing, I don't really understand why it troubles you. I don't believe in God, and I don't need to in order to find happiness or a sence of purpose. Things that make you happy, a favorite album, food, sex, goofing around with good friends, sports, whatever, that's reason enough to be! Even feeling sad makes you feel alive, think about it. Why does all this nescessarily need to lead to an afterlife or whatever? Enjoy the moment and don't let it pass you by, constantly thinking about the future.

Anyway, what gets me through the day is a very simple thought : Every new beginning in life is tough, there's no denying that. When you're at the foot of a mountain it just seems like a big uninteresting pile of rock. But when you get to the top and see the world below it makes it all worthwhile. That's pretty much the way it is in life : If you keep feeling low and going half-cut through every situation you'll just see problems piling up. But if you strive to be the best you can be you'll eventually take control of things and rise up. Then you'll feel better about yourself and that "aura" will pass through to those around you.

I agree Asgardlord. Existentialism is key especially for those of us that don't expect an afterlife. The problem is existentialism works nicely in theory, but in practice most of us tend to be miserable. Remember that someone will always have a worse situation than you. For example, 26 million people worldwide remain actual slaves. Don't forget that death is the great equalizer.

Excellent post, Asgardlord, I agree fully.

I was probably about 14-15 when I started to believe that there is nothing but oblivion after you die, and that's never changed since then. When I first came to this realisation I actually did feel really down, and I felt like the prospect of death was just something I couldn't face. Every day I had really intense morbid fears. I would have sleepless nights worrying that the train I would be on in 2 weeks would crash.

But then I came out the other side of it, and my beliefs hadn't changed at all. But I just realised that instead of making everything futile, it meant that I had a really intense desire to make the most of the 7-8 decades I hope to have. Actually the belief that you have no higher purpose is kind of liberating.

On the other hand, if you actually have a serotonin(?) imbalance then that's something that can't be rectified just through a positive attitude. There's nothing wrong with needing pills to keep your dark side at bay. It's a mechanical defect within your body just like any other illness or injury. It just happens to manifest itself in the form of emotional instead of physical pain.

I had hallucinations while on Zoloft.

This is kind of a touchy subject for me right now because a girl in my school just committed suicide. While what happended very awful, it makes me realize how selfish suicide is. During school today emotions ranged from sad to completely distraught. I think my mom who is a nurse said it best when she said that while she is trying to save people's lives this girl just takes her own.

On the issue of being depressed yourself I've found that constantly examining yourself and your life can make you depressed. What I think can help is being selfless and putting your attention on other people's lives. While this is hard to do all the time, just doing it sometimes can make you feel insturmental to something greater than your own self. Therefore you feel less depressed.

"I'm so depressed."
"There are people in Africa who are dying of AIDs in horrible pain."
"Wow! When you put it that way, all my depression vanishes!"

^never happened.

I have been happier since I threw God out of my life.

Life has lots to offer: you're stuck on this notion that if you cannot live forever, why live at all? As already pointed out, there is a lot to live for.

Honestly, if you had all the answers, and you had an eternity to dwell on nothing... how "happy" would that really make you?

Intelligence does NOT paralell with depression. People who are suicidal are people who put emotion before logic. People who think with their heart are far less rational--sorry, it's the truth.

I accept my circumstance, and I am fucking grateful. I was born as a human being--the dominant species. I was born into what I consider to be the best country in the world. I was born into a middle-income family (which, by global standards, is really good), and with decent looks to boot. I was born with intelligence, among other things. Yes, it helped me realize that there is no God, but I don't need fucking God.

I am God. You are God. Use your power to make yourself a bit less miserable and enjoy life. And remember: when you're dead, you won't be able to care that you're dead. So fuck the notion of God; you need to make your heaven here on Earth.

No. I can definitley control how much serontonin I produce. :roll:

I used to be on paxil when I was in 5th - 6th grade. Around that time I had a panic attack problem. I think too much and worry alot about many things including really stupid things. I'm not a manic depressive but there are many days where Im just not happy at all.