Metal Reviews

Larry's a good one... he's even making the right face in your avatar.

Exactly!

Dustin Hoffman as Grutle Kjellson. Tom Hanks as Mortiis.

I could go on all day.

Keanu Reeves as Aliester Crowley.

This is going to be so great, i can imagine all the teenage girls "OMG Varg is sooo hot", fucking awesome.

This has become a huge case here, and practically none of the bug BM-peepz like it. They have been boycotting the book, and I guess they'll do the same with the movie. Ulver remains positive though, as they'll most likely compose the music

I'm excited about the cultural impact this could have. Could we be witnessing the beginning of a new age for mainstream, socially accepted metal?

I really hope that doesn't happen.

Or they'll make it out as some freak thing, like underground Metal is usually viewed.

+ fucking 1

Aside from anything else, who wants to make arson, Nazism and murder socially acceptable?

It was truly more a cultural movement than just another style of music. A movement that isn't really quite understood by anyone outside of that particular circle. It's really strange to think that all of this was started by what was, at the time, a bunch of bored teenagers.

Please, PLEASE, one of us reviewers has to see it and write a lolworthy review.

Oh man I wish I could direct this movie... It would be so great. Playing black metal would summon demons that would wreak bloody veangeance on the Christians who bullied Varg in high school.

There would also be lots of long and slow shots of him looking sad, angry, attractive, and lonely as he walks through the snow.

Then it would go all Bedlam in Goliath and the black metal guys would start fighting for control of the demons, who would actually just be manipulating them, and that would fuck everyone over. Requiem for a Dream-style montage at the end except instead of having three people with ruined lives, there would just be Euronymous and Dead's corpses, then Varg getting prosecuted or whatever the hell happened to him.

edit: Fuck it, I'd cast Jared Leto as Varg and Burzum's music would be 30 Seconds to Mars songs.

Would there be Requiem for a Dream-style ass to ass?

Fuck yes. There would have to be!

It'll be quite interesting to see how they'll portray many of the people involved as most of them are still alive. Portraying them as mwah-ha-hahing caricatures would have all sorts of legal issues, wouldn't it? Mind, they did carve that image for themselves.

that guy that played the evil wizard from Lord of the rings and Dooku from Star wars would be a good older Ghaal.

You mean Christopher Lee?

He can sing too

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z93Sdirn ... re=related

They are mwah-ha-hahing caricatures

You could do a flashback scene of varg's teen years in wich he is being molested by a priest and uses a crucifix on Varg's ass.

Oh and i love your Jared Leto's idea.

What does Ulver have to do with black metal?