Chuck Norris has no sense of humour.

Goat · **Posted:** Wed Jan 11, 2006 6:38 pm

Quote:

IN RESPONSE TO THE "RANDOM FACTS" THAT ARE BEING GENERATED ON THE INTERNET

I'm aware of the made up declarations about me that have recently begun to appear on the Internet and in emails as "Chuck Norris facts." I've seen some of them. Some are funny. Some are pretty far out. Being more a student of the Wild West than the wild world of the Internet, I'm not quite sure what to make of it. It's quite surprising. I do know that boys will be boys, and I neither take offense nor take these things too seriously. Who knows, maybe these made up one-liners will prompt young people to seek out the real facts as found in my recent autobiographical book, "Against All Odds?" They may even be interested enough to check out my novels set in the Old West, "The Justice Riders," released this month. I'm very proud of these literary efforts.
~ Chuck Norris

http://www.chucknorris.com/html/events.aspx?type=1

Hilarious! Just another opportunity to sell yourself, huh?

lizardtail · **Posted:** Wed Jan 11, 2006 6:40 pm

Fun fact: The chief export of Chuck Norris is his recent autobiographical book, "Against All Odds", available in all good bookstores.

(doesn't have quite as much of a ring to it)

Radagast · **Posted:** Wed Jan 11, 2006 6:41 pm

Fantastic!

Chuck Norris > World

Eyesore · **Posted:** Wed Jan 11, 2006 6:56 pm

Zad wrote:

Quote:

IN RESPONSE TO THE "RANDOM FACTS" THAT ARE BEING GENERATED ON THE INTERNET

I'm aware of the made up declarations about me that have recently begun to appear on the Internet and in emails as "Chuck Norris facts." I've seen some of them. Some are funny. Some are pretty far out. Being more a student of the Wild West than the wild world of the Internet, I'm not quite sure what to make of it. It's quite surprising. I do know that boys will be boys, and I neither take offense nor take these things too seriously. Who knows, maybe these made up one-liners will prompt young people to seek out the real facts as found in my recent autobiographical book, "Against All Odds?" They may even be interested enough to check out my novels set in the Old West, "The Justice Riders," released this month. I'm very proud of these literary efforts.
~ Chuck Norris

http://www.chucknorris.com/html/events.aspx?type=1

Hilarious! Just another opportunity to sell yourself, huh?

He should run with it and earn some cash. This is like when the Star Wars Kid didn't want all the attention! :shock: You fat, fucking idiot! Why not run with it?

Andy Milonakis KO1 Chuck Norris KO1 Star Wars Kid

Morons. If you do something stupid online and it catches on, make some cash. Case in point, the guy who did the Christmas light display to "Wizards At Winter," that was made into a Miller Lite commercial. Now, granted it caught on late in the season and didn't get much airplay, rest assured that it will play again next year and both he and Trans-Siberian Orchestra will make some cash. This is what Chucky muthafucky should be doing, "Yeah, that's right...I killed Godzilla. So what?"

Goat · **Posted:** Wed Jan 11, 2006 6:59 pm

Apparently he's accepted Jesus into his soul and now pimps himself out to get the Bible taught in schools.

Edit: http://www.collegehumor.com/movies/1598960/

lizardtail · **Posted:** Wed Jan 11, 2006 7:00 pm

Zad wrote:

Apparently he's accepted Jesus into his soul and now pimps himself out to get the Bible taught in schools.

Edit: http://www.collegehumor.com/movies/1598960/

whoever told you that is your enemy.

Chuck Norris doesn't believe in Jesus. Jesus believes in Chuck Norris.

Eyesore · **Posted:** Wed Jan 11, 2006 7:01 pm

Zad wrote:

Apparently he's accepted Jesus into his soul and now pimps himself out to get the Bible taught in schools.

Edit: http://www.collegehumor.com/movies/1598960/

Good to see the asshole hasn't lost his flare for great acting.

Radagast · **Posted:** Wed Jan 11, 2006 7:03 pm

Zad wrote:

Apparently he's accepted Jesus into his soul and now pimps himself out to get the Bible taught in schools.

Edit: http://www.collegehumor.com/movies/1598960/

He also appears in excercise machine infomercials. I'm telling you there's no better way for a crowd of drunk friends to kill half an hour before the start of a film than watching one of them saying "when's Chuck going to appear," and then he does in the last five minutes to say "Chuck would".

And there was much rejoicing.

Legacy Of The Night · **Posted:** Wed Jan 11, 2006 10:04 pm

Eyesore wrote:

Zad wrote:

Quote:

IN RESPONSE TO THE "RANDOM FACTS" THAT ARE BEING GENERATED ON THE INTERNET

I'm aware of the made up declarations about me that have recently begun to appear on the Internet and in emails as "Chuck Norris facts." I've seen some of them. Some are funny. Some are pretty far out. Being more a student of the Wild West than the wild world of the Internet, I'm not quite sure what to make of it. It's quite surprising. I do know that boys will be boys, and I neither take offense nor take these things too seriously. Who knows, maybe these made up one-liners will prompt young people to seek out the real facts as found in my recent autobiographical book, "Against All Odds?" They may even be interested enough to check out my novels set in the Old West, "The Justice Riders," released this month. I'm very proud of these literary efforts.
~ Chuck Norris

http://www.chucknorris.com/html/events.aspx?type=1

Hilarious! Just another opportunity to sell yourself, huh?

He should run with it and earn some cash. This is like when the Star Wars Kid didn't want all the attention! :shock: You fat, fucking idiot! Why not run with it?

Andy Milonakis KO1 Chuck Norris KO1 Star Wars Kid

BRGLE-RRRRRR ANDY MILONAKIS IS SATAN!1@#!!!~!!! :evil:

That kid's not funny. Whoever had the idea of giving him his own show is a fucking moron.

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/videos/antiandy.html

Eternal Idol · **Posted:** Wed Jan 11, 2006 10:22 pm

Legacy Of The Night wrote:

Eyesore wrote:

Zad wrote:

Quote:

IN RESPONSE TO THE "RANDOM FACTS" THAT ARE BEING GENERATED ON THE INTERNET

I'm aware of the made up declarations about me that have recently begun to appear on the Internet and in emails as "Chuck Norris facts." I've seen some of them. Some are funny. Some are pretty far out. Being more a student of the Wild West than the wild world of the Internet, I'm not quite sure what to make of it. It's quite surprising. I do know that boys will be boys, and I neither take offense nor take these things too seriously. Who knows, maybe these made up one-liners will prompt young people to seek out the real facts as found in my recent autobiographical book, "Against All Odds?" They may even be interested enough to check out my novels set in the Old West, "The Justice Riders," released this month. I'm very proud of these literary efforts.
~ Chuck Norris

http://www.chucknorris.com/html/events.aspx?type=1

Hilarious! Just another opportunity to sell yourself, huh?

He should run with it and earn some cash. This is like when the Star Wars Kid didn't want all the attention! :shock: You fat, fucking idiot! Why not run with it?

Andy Milonakis KO1 Chuck Norris KO1 Star Wars Kid

BRGLE-RRRRRR ANDY MILONAKIS IS SATAN!1@#!!!~!!! :evil:

That kid's not funny. Whoever had the idea of giving him his own show is a fucking moron.

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/videos/antiandy.html

HaHa! It was MTV. What do you expect? They cancel genius like Wondershowzen and give that fat fuck a show. Go figure... :roll:

Azrael · **Posted:** Wed Jan 11, 2006 10:25 pm

but who is that fat kid? is he the star wars kid?

i've had the misfortune of being bored late at night and catching his lame show on tv. it's one thing to have stupid humor - but this show simply has no humor. it's terrible, it's beyond stupid, it's annoying, it's retarded. count on mtv to bring us shit like that.

i hope he dies in a big chemical fire.

Eternal Idol · **Posted:** Wed Jan 11, 2006 10:30 pm

Azrael wrote:

but who is that fat kid? is he the star wars kid?

i've had the misfortune of being bored late at night and catching his lame show on tv. it's one thing to have stupid humor - but this show simply has no humor. it's terrible, it's beyond stupid, it's annoying, it's retarded. count on mtv to bring us shit like that.

i hope he dies in a big chemical fire.

Yes, he's the Star Wars kid. He's also the Matrix bloke that Zad had for an avatar for a while.

A chemical fire would be to good for him. Kill him in sloth fashion, Seven style. 8)

Eyesore · **Posted:** Wed Jan 11, 2006 11:02 pm

Eternal Idol wrote:

Azrael wrote:

but who is that fat kid? is he the star wars kid?

i've had the misfortune of being bored late at night and catching his lame show on tv. it's one thing to have stupid humor - but this show simply has no humor. it's terrible, it's beyond stupid, it's annoying, it's retarded. count on mtv to bring us shit like that.

i hope he dies in a big chemical fire.

Yes, he's the Star Wars kid. He's also the Matrix bloke that Zad had for an avatar for a while.

A chemical fire would be to good for him. Kill him in sloth fashion, Seven style. 8)

Andy Milonakis is not the Stars Wars kid. The Stars Wars kid is actually a kid, Milonakis is an adult with a disease that makes him appear to be a kid.

Blame Jimmy Kimmel, he started putting him on his show and apparently MTV felt they could make some cash on him. He's horrible! Not one bit funny. The only thing he ever did that was funny was the "Superbowl Is Gay" song, and that was just funny because it appeared to be this fat kid making an ass of himself online.

Eternal Idol · **Posted:** Wed Jan 11, 2006 11:05 pm

Eyesore wrote:

Eternal Idol wrote:

Azrael wrote:

but who is that fat kid? is he the star wars kid?

i've had the misfortune of being bored late at night and catching his lame show on tv. it's one thing to have stupid humor - but this show simply has no humor. it's terrible, it's beyond stupid, it's annoying, it's retarded. count on mtv to bring us shit like that.

i hope he dies in a big chemical fire.

Yes, he's the Star Wars kid. He's also the Matrix bloke that Zad had for an avatar for a while.

A chemical fire would be to good for him. Kill him in sloth fashion, Seven style. 8)

Andy Milonakis is not the Stars Wars kid. The Stars Wars kid is actually a kid, Milonakis is an adult with a disease that makes him appear to be a kid.

Hmmm. You learn something new every day. I had no idea he had that condition. Still think he's a fat piece of shit. Kind of how I feel about Jimmy Kimmel as well.

Eyesore · **Posted:** Wed Jan 11, 2006 11:19 pm

I find Jimmy Kimmel to be pretty funny. Hahaha.

Azrael · **Posted:** Wed Jan 11, 2006 11:21 pm

i didn't know about that.. but he still sucks ass.

seriously, who the FUCK considers that shit the least bit funny?

Argonaut · **Posted:** Thu Jan 12, 2006 10:06 am

Dude that is like someone asking who would consider anything on MTV worth watching? Unfortunatly the answer to this is sadly way too many people. :cry: Mankind is lost

Ness · **Posted:** Thu Jan 12, 2006 11:57 am

Eyesore wrote:

I find Jimmy Kimmel to be pretty funny. Hahaha.

Him and Adam Carolla. When they get together, you can expect a good show.

Anonymous · **Posted:** Fri Jan 13, 2006 1:08 am

This is awesome. I love that he plugged his books.

Dudeguy · **Posted:** Mon Jan 16, 2006 5:10 pm

on that same site they do Mr. T and Vin Diesel facts too, just go to google and search Chuck Norris facts and click on the second link...i think.

Metal Reviews

Chuck Norris has no sense of humour.

Who is online