Terror 2000 - Terror For Sale
Scarlet Records
Speed Thrash
13 songs (39'47)
Release year: 2005
Terror 2000, Scarlet Records
Reviewed by Jason

Some words of warning: If you’re looking for a CD that has the faintest hint of musical or lyrical depth, use this disc as a guideline of what NOT to buy. If on the other hand you are looking for an album that will give senior citizen heart attacks, force epileptics into seizures, and make you feel unnaturally violent, this is the one to buy. For those of you who aren’t familiar with Terror 2000, the band is a side project consisting of members from Darkane and Soilwork, and though I am not familiar how this project came to be, my guess is that the members wanted to keep their serious material for their respective bands and keep to in touch with their thrashing roots by forming a project that proclaims “If metal CD’s were people, Terror 2000 would be a drunken aggressive lunatic on the verge of a cocaine overdose”.

This newest effort by the Terror-ists (ha) is one that takes speed metal to a new level and bizarre antics within the genre even further. These weird antics have nothing to do with the band’s image or what they do on stage but have more to do with the lyrics which are actually quite funny. One just has to read the song titles such Wrath of the Cookie Monster and Liquor Saved me from Sports or listen to choruses like “I like to hear you scream, I like the melody, I’d love to shove you in some chocolate ice cream. I like to see you crawl, I like to have a ball, I’d like to hit your face with a fucking baseball” to get the jist of where this band is coming from. If these lyrics were sung in a conventional heavy metal fashion or if the music backing them up wasn’t played at hyper speeds, the band would seem absolutely retarded, but the fact that they’re sung amidst a total onslaught of riffs with the energetic equivalent of someone tripping on amphetamines makes this quite an entertaining album… in a fist flailing, groin kicking kind of way.

Obviously, Terror For Sale is a straightforward album doesn’t cease from thrashing for even a second. The tracks average three minutes each, and while I was expecting this to be a really repetitive album (which tends to be the most common flaw with these kinds of releases), I was happy to hear that most of the tracks have riffs and choruses that are different enough to make each track fairly distinct. The members of Soilwork and Darkane are quite the talented bunch and succeed in delivering an album which is quite eclectic for this kind of straightforward thrash-fest.

Overall this is quite the successful album and what makes it so is the fact that the members don’t likely take this project too seriously. It sounds like a group of talented friends got together and said “lets get wasted and do something crazy-fast, stupid and see if it sounds good”. Well it turns out that it does! Even the hyper chicken klucking in Flesh Fever Fiesta, and messed-up blues doo-wopping in Bloody Blues Blaster does… oddly. Like I said if you’re looking for something serious, don’t even consider this CD, but if you’re lookin for one that is insane in every way possible check it out.

Killing Songs :
Flesh Fever Fiesta, Satan's Barbeque, Liquor Saved Me From Sports
Jason quoted 79 / 100
Aleksie quoted 88 / 100
Other albums by Terror 2000 that we have reviewed:
Terror 2000 - Slaughter In Japan reviewed by Danny and quoted no quote
Terror 2000 - Slaughterhouse Supremacy reviewed by Danny and quoted 78 / 100
0 readers voted
You did not vote yet.
Vote now

There are 9 replies to this review. Last one on Wed Aug 30, 2006 4:08 pm
View and Post comments